Sunday, October 02, 2011

Advertising initiative

Can Gurnites think of any more verses that might prove useful one day to the like of such initiatives?


Back to the future said...

Ooh, this could could be fun!

Head along the new Nairn bypass
It'll really help the town's eysores fly past
No stopping on our narrow High Street
But shop online and save your sore feet

Running for the shelter said...

Waiting for the Doc's new train
Used the shelter to get out the rain
Five years now I've been standing here
It'll be along soon never fear

growtosow said...

lots of seeds and stuff for weeds, food for you and food for your plants.

shopped said...

Our run down shops are quite a delight
but some of the prices will give you a fright
After 10:30 or late at night
everything closes, sleep tight

Nairncairn said...

Come see our Provost with his shrunken chain
falling down buildings on our street of shame
See our carbuncle of architecture
famous is Nairn for what we're not sure

Henry the heron said...

Rubbish on beaches and brown doggie poo
makes walking along so tricky to do
Carry oots chucked on the street corner too
give Salty our gull something to chew

Book her said...

Nairn, in darkness and blight

Anonymous said...

Local housing, for local people.
If you don't live in Nairn, you're not welcome here.

Anonymous said...

Well, I think the signs are great. At least someone is doing something positive for the town, unlike most of the contributors in this post. Why can't they use their rhyming talent to come up with something inspiring? Nairn is not a bad place to live in.

Val the Vulture said...

Macdonald, Fraser, Marsden, Park
the four of them will mak you nark
all they have done is let us doon
fit an big advert for oor Toon.

Anonymous said...

By the time the Gurn goes to press
I'll be on ma way tae Inverness
I cannae shop in Nairn wi style
Cus I work everyday in the Golden Mile

Anonymous said...

You could probably get a grant for this and make it part of the Nairn Art and Book festival

Topaz( acting ANB Chair) said...

The adverts were paid for by the Association of Nairn Businesses, just to illuminate those folks coming into town from the east that Nairn has a town centre.

Michael Green kindly let us use his trailers & the land to site them on.

Further similar campaigns are currently 'work in progress'.

The piece in full as follows -

One table
Two postcards
and coffee for three
A bouquet of flowers
Some oatcakes and Brie

Two nights with breakfast
one shiny new putter
a round under par
and a steak for your supper

Lotions and potions
Strawberries for tea
A present for granny
And parking for free

Hammers and spanners
Newspapers and books
A bike for the bairn
and equipment for cooks

A sparkly new necklace
two pairs of new shoes
sit by the beach
and just soak up the views.

Fancy new radio
Fancy new dress
Fancy new hairdo
If yours is a mess

A steam train
Some photos
One hand knitted hat
A scrumptious steak pie
And a bed for the cat

Nairn. Try something traditional

As you stand in the field by the signs, a train passing in the quiet of the evening may just afford you a sound bite from another dimension , where you will hear W H Auden slowly turn over in his grave.

Pipkins Sebastion Smithers said...

Visit our Nairn & to have a Look
its been nominated as a Big Plook
Nairnbairn made some locals scoff
The Nairnie said they maybe a toff

Ealain-Donan -MacRath said...

What a waste off money they would be better off spending the money Cleaning the Roans up the Highstreet and Community Centre and Cleaning IE:Pressure Washing The Slabs at The War Memorial for Rememberence Sunday. They should get there priorities right first whats needing done than wasting money on something that is there for the short term. Can any Gurnights tell me how mutch has this cost i would love to know as probally it would off been a small fortune wasted as far as iam conserned. Iam not againt anybody trying to promote Nairn but just think about what ive just said.

Anonymous said...

Things may be grim
So please don't be dim
Want your tills full of notes?
Give Graham Marsden all your votes!

Anonymous said...

Welcome to Nairn - Stay a while amidst our Carbuncular charm

Mr Dubs said...

Go in the field
Have a walkround if you like
But please be careful
You don't stand in the Shite

Spurtle said...

An observation on the comments, rather than the original topic:

Some of them can't spell
Some of them can't tell
The money didn't come from the public purse

Nairn simply seems the pits
Tiptoe through the doggy shits'
There can't be many places that could be worse

If it's so bad
Really drives you so mad
Why in creation would you want to stay ?

If you don't like it,
Get your bag and hike it
I hear that Fort William is really rather nice

real shops said...

Inverness only 19 miles

Anonymous said...

Sign at Sandown - "Tesco only 14miles, but if your desperate Sainsbury is close. Otherwise you're wasting your time".

Sign at Balmakeith - "Tesco only 10 miles, but if you're desperate Sainsbury right here. Otherwise you're wasting your time".

Anonymous said...

Hike to Fort William? It seems the judges will soon be hiking round
Nairn, Fort William, and Linwood