Can Gurnites think of any more verses that might prove useful one day to the like of such initiatives? 
A Gurn from Nurn - News, opinion and pictures from sunny Nairnshire - keep in touch, bookmark the Gurn
A Gurn from Nurn - News, opinion and pictures from sunny Nairnshire - keep in touch, bookmark the Gurn
22 comments:
Ooh, this could could be fun!
Head along the new Nairn bypass
It'll really help the town's eysores fly past
No stopping on our narrow High Street
But shop online and save your sore feet
Waiting for the Doc's new train
Used the shelter to get out the rain
Five years now I've been standing here
It'll be along soon never fear
lots of seeds and stuff for weeds, food for you and food for your plants.
Our run down shops are quite a delight
but some of the prices will give you a fright
After 10:30 or late at night
everything closes, sleep tight
Come see our Provost with his shrunken chain
falling down buildings on our street of shame
See our carbuncle of architecture
famous is Nairn for what we're not sure
Rubbish on beaches and brown doggie poo
makes walking along so tricky to do
Carry oots chucked on the street corner too
give Salty our gull something to chew
Nairn, in darkness and blight
Local housing, for local people.
If you don't live in Nairn, you're not welcome here.
Well, I think the signs are great. At least someone is doing something positive for the town, unlike most of the contributors in this post. Why can't they use their rhyming talent to come up with something inspiring? Nairn is not a bad place to live in.
Macdonald, Fraser, Marsden, Park
the four of them will mak you nark
all they have done is let us doon
fit an big advert for oor Toon.
By the time the Gurn goes to press
I'll be on ma way tae Inverness
I cannae shop in Nairn wi style
Cus I work everyday in the Golden Mile
You could probably get a grant for this and make it part of the Nairn Art and Book festival
The adverts were paid for by the Association of Nairn Businesses, just to illuminate those folks coming into town from the east that Nairn has a town centre.
Michael Green kindly let us use his trailers & the land to site them on.
Further similar campaigns are currently 'work in progress'.
The piece in full as follows -
One table
Two postcards
and coffee for three
A bouquet of flowers
Some oatcakes and Brie
Two nights with breakfast
one shiny new putter
a round under par
and a steak for your supper
Lotions and potions
Strawberries for tea
A present for granny
And parking for free
Hammers and spanners
Newspapers and books
A bike for the bairn
and equipment for cooks
A sparkly new necklace
two pairs of new shoes
sit by the beach
and just soak up the views.
Fancy new radio
Fancy new dress
Fancy new hairdo
If yours is a mess
A steam train
Some photos
One hand knitted hat
A scrumptious steak pie
And a bed for the cat
Nairn. Try something traditional
As you stand in the field by the signs, a train passing in the quiet of the evening may just afford you a sound bite from another dimension , where you will hear W H Auden slowly turn over in his grave.
Visit our Nairn & to have a Look
its been nominated as a Big Plook
Nairnbairn made some locals scoff
The Nairnie said they maybe a toff
What a waste off money they would be better off spending the money Cleaning the Roans up the Highstreet and Community Centre and Cleaning IE:Pressure Washing The Slabs at The War Memorial for Rememberence Sunday. They should get there priorities right first whats needing done than wasting money on something that is there for the short term. Can any Gurnights tell me how mutch has this cost i would love to know as probally it would off been a small fortune wasted as far as iam conserned. Iam not againt anybody trying to promote Nairn but just think about what ive just said.
Things may be grim
So please don't be dim
Want your tills full of notes?
Give Graham Marsden all your votes!
Welcome to Nairn - Stay a while amidst our Carbuncular charm
Go in the field
Have a walkround if you like
But please be careful
You don't stand in the Shite
An observation on the comments, rather than the original topic:
Some of them can't spell
Some of them can't tell
The money didn't come from the public purse
Nairn simply seems the pits
Tiptoe through the doggy shits'
There can't be many places that could be worse
If it's so bad
Really drives you so mad
Why in creation would you want to stay ?
If you don't like it,
Get your bag and hike it
I hear that Fort William is really rather nice
Inverness only 19 miles
Sign at Sandown - "Tesco only 14miles, but if your desperate Sainsbury is close. Otherwise you're wasting your time".
Sign at Balmakeith - "Tesco only 10 miles, but if you're desperate Sainsbury right here. Otherwise you're wasting your time".
Hike to Fort William? It seems the judges will soon be hiking round
Nairn, Fort William, and Linwood
Post a Comment